Cool For The Summer

The weather have been gloomy for the past week. Its cold and windy. I want to snuggle and cuddle all day all night. Its been raining day and night. Its kinda hard to go out during this kind of weather. I haven't been to gym since last Friday but I'm back yesterday. For the amount of 4 days a lot of stuff happened.

It was somehow overwhelming but somehow not. I've always wonder what is it like to be in a relationship. I'm not being skeptical but there are few guys who is really interested in me. I always felt that I don't deserved any of them (some don't deserve to be with me. lol) . First one had a great impact for me. He stirred up my heart so much and it broke me even harder. He still cared for me. We met again on Monday. He always tried to make me talk more and care for me so much. I'm grateful and felt so loved that I really don't want to broke his relationship with his girlfriend. 

I was already a shy person in the first place. Never take initiative, how could I even make a move on him. Even if I have taken his heart I will never be happy. Its like third party interfere. I will never be happy to take him away from his current long girlfriend. I would never separate people's happiness in order to achieve my own happiness. Its too cruel and my future is going to be devastated. So I ended giving up so much earlier when I knew he has a girlfriend.

The second one is definitely OMG. We met at church as well. He was one of the person that I can't go with. First he's a teacher so he preach too much and a preacher as well, second he decided to become a priest after we meet for few months lol. I was like I cannot approach him anymore longer or gave anymore attention to him. I fear that he stop being a priest lol. I'm not sure but especially my instinct is far more accurate than anyone else. He always look so happy when he saw me. His smile was like so big that you could see his apple cheeks even tho he is skinny. HAHA

The third one is triple OMG. Too ugly, short. He knows my current work and he's a relative of my colleague. So there's too much connection and he's ugly as well. Always talk too much about my current work, he just talk to much I wish he could shut up. 

The last one, I'm not sure if its even relevant. We met at gym. HAHAHAHA He's hot and good looking. We only talked once and never more. But when we met at the gym he and I always secretly looking at each other. I have 180 degree eye sight please! HAHA btw I can't wait for the gym's grand opening! Looking forward to meeting more new people that day. 

Oh last thing before I end my blog post. I've decided to get a tattoo! A cross tattoo at the back of my neck and a feather on my wrist! I'll write up my experience when I've got the tattoo! So excited.

OH GOD FORGIVE ME THAT I HAVE SIN. AMEN. 

Till then,

Cheers.

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I think I have way too much ranting post. I always wonder if you guys even read my blog for no reason or just stumble upon without knowing it? I was absent at work today. I was lazy, tired and sick. I was sick of everything. At first I was really sick with flu and headache. But I went to the doctor, by then my flu was gone. I was practically fine. I was making it as an excuses for getting a sick leave form. Typical lazy ass girl I am. I fetch my friend and headed to Heritage Building. To pay our respect and tribute to the victim and heroes that lost their life. It was raining in such hot weather. 

Did you guys saw me?? I was holding an umbrella talking on the phone with my supervisor. Those guys were from suriafmsabah station. They were taking picture non stop. I was like, you pay respect and mourn for the people that was affected, Not to take picture all the way from start till the end. I even scold my friend for being like that. She kept on taking picture and video. I have to take picture of her as well. but then its always for publicity. To show off. I have nothing to say or comment about the social media right now. 

I didn't really have the chance to pray or have silence moment at all. There's few media as well. For interview session with some local people and suriafmsabah crew. I was like dragging my friend and run off as quickly as possible. I feel disgusted and intrigue with their act. Too much I must say.

Anyway running off to Asia City. Get our client's photo printed. I bought a USB drive at Hong Kong months ago. It was like super cheap, RM20. Somehow certain computer can't detect my USB drive. I was like wtf. I need to get my photo printed. Its for my own collection. I'm going to print, signed and sealed it with the frame. And one day I will open up an exhibit to show my photograph I've taken. This is my biggest dream in my whole life. Work hard. Its all about working hard for my dream and passion!

After that I went for karaoke session to release my stress. I've been stressing a lot lately out of nowhere. I always get anxiety and stress out for no reason. It was just depressing I guess. I haven't sang for so long. My voice is like chicken. Ugly voice.  Its not enough. I need more singing session. I need to swim. Swim for 2 hours or more as well. Its nice to swim. I've been craving!? Yes I've been craving for swimming lol. I swam last 2 weeks ago it was awesome and tired as hell. Swimming is my latest stress relief method instead of jogging. It cools me down faster.

So I went home and took a long nap. from 4pm til 7pm. I woke up feeling so much better but physically and mentally tired still. I think I'm stressing myself with work too much. With my work life going through right now is just too much. Lack of assistant and worker right now. I feel like I'm having too much work going on that I don't even know which to start first. Because all of the work I'm doing right now is just as important as it is. Its making me depressed. I've been making lots of mistake as well, making things even worst. Oh well either I go with the flow or change job. That's all I could think off. 

I'm sure you guys felt depressed reading this post. Its overwhelming and stuff happening. Oh Australia please grant my wish okay? I'm waiting for you. I'm waiting for your confirmation. As soon as it confirms I will start my planning a.s.a.p. The faster the better. I hope everything goes on smoothly and well. I need to escape a real one soon.

Till then

God Bless. 

Mcnally & Lily Pre-wedding

We just ended our actual wedding for Mcnally & Lily two weeks ago.

It was extremely overwhelming and exhaustion. It was a life time experience. 

We did pre-wedding session with them as well.

They were fun and easy going couple I must say!

All I could say that we were still a bit of  immature in handling some situation.

I gave too much direction during my actual photography session

because I couldn't find the feel or the right spot.

As if I'm not give it all to the event. I don't feel inspired at all.

I've looked into all the photos for actual wedding its a bit disappointing.

There's not one picture that I've like. Its too normal or too bland for my taste.

I need to improve for my actual wedding event!

Work hard play hard!

Its holiday in Sabah & Sarawak today till Monday!

Gonna have some blast and night out with my girls for some stress relieve.

Dukzi dukzi here we come!!!! haha

Till then

Cheers & God Bless

YOLO FOR REAL

This time I YOLO-ed for real. 

So real that I nearly die. Not really.

I have a meeting with my client at Bukit Kokol.

All local knows that Bukit Kokol has the perches hill. 

Its like non stop drifting through the perch hill.

I mean I was driving auto car. ITS AUTO CAR.

Both manual and auto car has pros & cons 

I even went for INANAM route. It was the worst route I've been through.

I just wanna Thank God I'm still alive and wrote this blog. hahahaha

The hills were small, filled with holes and 

the height throughout the journey probably 50 to 70 degree

It was so high that my car nearly doesn't have the strength to go up that high.

But Thank God again I'm alive and managed to drive up to Bukit Kokol.

We took picture to commemorate the success of arriving to Bukit Kokol.

I swear we tremble hard when we walk out from the car.

It was a sigh of relieved but not entirely. Cause we have to go back.

This time we went back through Menggatal route. 

The road were smooth, no holes but we drifted hard.

I went for gear 2 the entire way back through Menggatal route.

It was all just way down to the hill, I think I even felt the pain from the car I'm driving.

It was a total sigh of relieved when we arrived to Menggatal Town.

My friend was like in puking mode. 

So I told my parents that I'm going to drive to Bukit Kokol next week.

Parents were against it. They were worried that I might get into accident.

So I didn't told them about today's event. hahaha

I probably get killed if I told them or could barred me from going to the event.

Things just get started. My life suddenly filled with different prospect & perspective.

It makes me more matured and think about my future. 

Life is full of challenges. More challenges ahead of me.

Live your life to the fullest.

Gonna strive for the best and work hard for my future!

Cheers & God Bless!

 p/s: I'm gonna plan a trip alone to Jeju Island probably in 2017. Anyone? ;) haha

Ciloryain solo shoot

I just upgrade my camera not long ago. 

So I'm keen on testing out the camera.

Previously I'm using 650D for all wedding and others outdoor shooting.

I was never keen to accept any actual wedding cause it really terrified me.

Not to mention 650D is not par up to that level for actual wedding shoot.

I decided to change and get a new one 5D Mark II. Not really a new one, 2nd hand.

I convinced myself that once I've master using 5D I'm going to get my own.

Testing shoot below!

*Heavy breathing*

 

I like the fact that its full frame, AF point focus on object that I really want.

Each photo has peripheral illumination.

Not to mention the owner sold me wide angle lens, external battery& flash altogether. 

It was overwhelming! I haven't test out flash yet.

OMG compact flash are way too expensive. I literally cried T.T 

I was like in shocked to found out that compact flash literally cost me a bomb.

I need tons of CF card especially when it comes to actual wedding.

We don't wanna miss a thing. LOL

Hoping that everything goes on smoothly and well.

Cheers & God Bless!

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