Friday, December 11


I woke up super early today yet I was snuggling an hour on the bed. As usual woke up getting ready for work. I did a really short 3 minutes exercise & stretching. Then I realize I forgot to take out the bread in my bag. As expected it was full of ants. Cleaned my bag and found this Thankful note I wrote months ago?? 

Sorry for the poor writing & spelling. Probably wrote it without double checking. lol Immediately after reading this Thankful note, I am blessed. So blessed in all any way. Its really hard to be positive all the time, especially all the things I've been through lately. Somehow it boosted my confidence & strength enough to be so productive today. It gave me hope that I'm always capable of achieving all things through His guide. 

Being positive & thinking positive is hard. We usually encounter unpleasant event everyday whether its big or small. We do encounter positive & happy things but we usually forget. But when things get hard we couldn't think any positive way. Despite all the struggle I am really thankful & blessed. I think all these little bits of everyday life happened is planned by His almighty.

Be positive & think positive & feel blessed.

Cheers & God Bless!

Friday, November 27

Seoul Day 2 Part 2

OVERDUE POST! Like super over due from last year.
Its kinda hard for me to recall some of the places I've been to.
Nonetheless posting some of the picture I've went to!




I won't be posting travel post anymore. Cause its way too boring to read anyway. Hope you guys understands!

Sunday, November 8

Back to Reality

Hi guys I'm back with short updates! I am definitely or totally forgot the existence of this blog. I just got back from my Taiwan trip 5 days ago. It was the best trip I must say. People said once you go on a trip with your best friend you'll know part of their true color. I must say its real. Everyone has their true colors hidden within themselves. I'm one with the old fashion personality that take things quite cautiously. I don't do things that harms myself or feel disgusted. And I did all these stuff while I was on the trip. We went to club and the rest is history! HAHA

It was jam packed cause its Halloween night and fall on Saturday night. Got into the wrong queue, cut lines, ordered drinks, looking for good looking prey, on the dance floor all night after half drunk, get pick up by few mystery man, went back to hostel at 4am in the morning feeling all wasted yet awake at the same time, totally sober up. Irony of life. It was one hell of a night and its really tiring but so much fun compared to KK.   

We got lost quite a lot while we were in Taiwan cause we can't really differentiates their buildings. Everything looked just the same everywhere. Not to mention their traffic was horrid! Totally opposite and weird direction compared to ours! Got into the right bus but to the wrong route on the 1st day in Taichung, Get cheated by the greedy Taxi driver on the 3rd day when he drove us until Taipei. 

Can't remember our hostel on the 5th day cause we took the wrong route thinking it was correct. It was a gay parade on the 5th day & that's how we got lost on our way back that day. HAHAHA Last day was a total havoc. We were packing and laughing so hard. Cause there's too much stuff they bought. All go through smoothly when we checked in our luggage tho.

Upon arrival reality strikes pretty hard. But I'm glad I went to this trip at these time to release the stress. All my stress I build up the week before I fly was way too much. Anxiety strikes pretty hard. And I still have a pretty hard time get over it. I was so stress that makes me so hard to breathe and now I'm scared to drive alone. Oh God, Please help me.

Less than 50 days till Christmas btw! Excited!

Till then,
Cheer & God Bless all!

Tuesday, October 6

Physically & Mentally Exhausted

Usually when I always come back to blog saying I'm kind off hectic and busy and stuff but actually I was lazy all the time. But since I've started going to gym lately I made some progress as well. Slow but progressing. Thanks to my annoying friends who pushes me for a better healthier lifestyle.

Oh I'm gonna update little bits of my love life. Its over. HAHAHA I mean its not worth waiting when he's not going to look at my way you know. I'm tired and its wasting my time so much. I couldn't even focus on people around me when I only have eyes on him. But I'm glad I finally get over it. I met him as always during church party or event but it doesn't stir me up. I'm just glad everything is over.

Somehow I kinda felt like I've been constantly revisiting emergency hospital this year a lot. Grandma back pain, grandpa anemia & blood pressure. It turned out worst this time. My dad's turn. It wasn't a good thing. When my dad went numb and stiff on his right leg, things strike on me too hard. Its getting a little bit emotional for me. My dad always had back pain but its taking its toll now. The cartilage between the last back bone was too narrow and it pinches the vein that connect the right leg. 

Daddy couldn't even stand properly due to the numbness of the level. Medicine, physiotherapy and the last resort is operation. I think we are going through a lot now. For mom she's the toughest person that I've ever seen. For me and my brother we could only assist mom in helping dad to get recover. It was one whole of a roller coaster ride. I've been crying a lot without their knowledge cause I don't want to let them worried especially Dad. 

It was really difficult to dealt with health issue especially when they get older everyday. I was really frustrated because of all things it happened right now at these time of the moment. I'm not sure if its really a good or bad thing. All my plans were all scattered, jumbling ups and down without definite. I don't think I can go away when things turn out bad. I wonder if I'm able to leave this place without getting worried about my parents. Tough decision. 

I really just hope & pray my Dad gets better so I don't have to get worried. It breaks my heart so much. 

Till then,

God Bless.

Saturday, August 29


I just got my tattoo two days before my birthday.
I wasn't really sure why I wanted a tattoo.
It was my instinct to get a tattoo I guess. lol
I went to Jesselton Tattoo Shop at Kepayan. 

I wasn't really nervous to start with but as time goes by I get a little bit anxious.
We start thinking of the design as so Luther started to draw. 
At first I was planning to get two tattoo but I decided to just get one first. 
Oh please ignore tiny baby hair at my back it looked disgusting.

Luther then started to adjust the tattoo at my back. 
I was started to have cold sweat the moment I sit down. 
The machine was loud and I became so nervous!
Luckily Carrie was there with me.

It was painful as hell and it started to bleed. The needle were poking hard into my skin.
I'm vibrating as well. HAHA I went all stiff after were done. 
It was just as painful when we fall down and scratches down on the floor.
Its been 2 weeks already so its all healed. Dried and dead skin all pealed off.
I just need to get a photo shoot session for myself lol

Til then,
Cheers & God Bless

Monday, August 10

Family Portrait

I did a family shoot few months ago! 
Its probably the most over due post I've manage to keep in my draft. 
Oh well sharing some of the best picture I've taken so far.

Wednesday, August 5

Cool For The Summer

The weather have been gloomy for the past week. Its cold and windy. I want to snuggle and cuddle all day all night. Its been raining day and night. Its kinda hard to go out during this kind of weather. I haven't been to gym since last Friday but I'm back yesterday. For the amount of 4 days a lot of stuff happened.

It was somehow overwhelming but somehow not. I've always wonder what is it like to be in a relationship. I'm not being skeptical but there are few guys who is really interested in me. I always felt that I don't deserved any of them (some don't deserve to be with me. lol) . First one had a great impact for me. He stirred up my heart so much and it broke me even harder. He still cared for me. We met again on Monday. He always tried to make me talk more and care for me so much. I'm grateful and felt so loved that I really don't want to broke his relationship with his girlfriend. 

I was already a shy person in the first place. Never take initiative, how could I even make a move on him. Even if I have taken his heart I will never be happy. Its like third party interfere. I will never be happy to take him away from his current long girlfriend. I would never separate people's happiness in order to achieve my own happiness. Its too cruel and my future is going to be devastated. So I ended giving up so much earlier when I knew he has a girlfriend.

The second one is definitely OMG. We met at church as well. He was one of the person that I can't go with. First he's a teacher so he preach too much and a preacher as well, second he decided to become a priest after we meet for few months lol. I was like I cannot approach him anymore longer or gave anymore attention to him. I fear that he stop being a priest lol. I'm not sure but especially my instinct is far more accurate than anyone else. He always look so happy when he saw me. His smile was like so big that you could see his apple cheeks even tho he is skinny. HAHA

The third one is triple OMG. Too ugly, short. He knows my current work and he's a relative of my colleague. So there's too much connection and he's ugly as well. Always talk too much about my current work, he just talk to much I wish he could shut up. 

The last one, I'm not sure if its even relevant. We met at gym. HAHAHAHA He's hot and good looking. We only talked once and never more. But when we met at the gym he and I always secretly looking at each other. I have 180 degree eye sight please! HAHA btw I can't wait for the gym's grand opening! Looking forward to meeting more new people that day. 

Oh last thing before I end my blog post. I've decided to get a tattoo! A cross tattoo at the back of my neck and a feather on my wrist! I'll write up my experience when I've got the tattoo! So excited.


Till then,

Monday, June 8


I think I have way too much ranting post. I always wonder if you guys even read my blog for no reason or just stumble upon without knowing it? I was absent at work today. I was lazy, tired and sick. I was sick of everything. At first I was really sick with flu and headache. But I went to the doctor, by then my flu was gone. I was practically fine. I was making it as an excuses for getting a sick leave form. Typical lazy ass girl I am. I fetch my friend and headed to Heritage Building. To pay our respect and tribute to the victim and heroes that lost their life. It was raining in such hot weather. 

Did you guys saw me?? I was holding an umbrella talking on the phone with my supervisor. Those guys were from suriafmsabah station. They were taking picture non stop. I was like, you pay respect and mourn for the people that was affected, Not to take picture all the way from start till the end. I even scold my friend for being like that. She kept on taking picture and video. I have to take picture of her as well. but then its always for publicity. To show off. I have nothing to say or comment about the social media right now. 

I didn't really have the chance to pray or have silence moment at all. There's few media as well. For interview session with some local people and suriafmsabah crew. I was like dragging my friend and run off as quickly as possible. I feel disgusted and intrigue with their act. Too much I must say.
Anyway running off to Asia City. Get our client's photo printed. I bought a USB drive at Hong Kong months ago. It was like super cheap, RM20. Somehow certain computer can't detect my USB drive. I was like wtf. I need to get my photo printed. Its for my own collection. I'm going to print, signed and sealed it with the frame. And one day I will open up an exhibit to show my photograph I've taken. This is my biggest dream in my whole life. Work hard. Its all about working hard for my dream and passion!

After that I went for karaoke session to release my stress. I've been stressing a lot lately out of nowhere. I always get anxiety and stress out for no reason. It was just depressing I guess. I haven't sang for so long. My voice is like chicken. Ugly voice.  Its not enough. I need more singing session. I need to swim. Swim for 2 hours or more as well. Its nice to swim. I've been craving!? Yes I've been craving for swimming lol. I swam last 2 weeks ago it was awesome and tired as hell. Swimming is my latest stress relief method instead of jogging. It cools me down faster.

So I went home and took a long nap. from 4pm til 7pm. I woke up feeling so much better but physically and mentally tired still. I think I'm stressing myself with work too much. With my work life going through right now is just too much. Lack of assistant and worker right now. I feel like I'm having too much work going on that I don't even know which to start first. Because all of the work I'm doing right now is just as important as it is. Its making me depressed. I've been making lots of mistake as well, making things even worst. Oh well either I go with the flow or change job. That's all I could think off. 

I'm sure you guys felt depressed reading this post. Its overwhelming and stuff happening. Oh Australia please grant my wish okay? I'm waiting for you. I'm waiting for your confirmation. As soon as it confirms I will start my planning a.s.a.p. The faster the better. I hope everything goes on smoothly and well. I need to escape a real one soon.

Till then
God Bless. 

Saturday, May 30

Mcnally & Lily Pre-wedding

We just ended our actual wedding for Mcnally & Lily two weeks ago.
It was extremely overwhelming and exhaustion. It was a life time experience. 
We did pre-wedding session with them as well.
They were fun and easy going couple I must say!

All I could say that we were still a bit of  immature in handling some situation.
I gave too much direction during my actual photography session
because I couldn't find the feel or the right spot.
As if I'm not give it all to the event. I don't feel inspired at all.
I've looked into all the photos for actual wedding its a bit disappointing.
There's not one picture that I've like. Its too normal or too bland for my taste.
I need to improve for my actual wedding event!
Work hard play hard!
Its holiday in Sabah & Sarawak today till Monday!
Gonna have some blast and night out with my girls for some stress relieve.
Dukzi dukzi here we come!!!! haha

Till then
Cheers & God Bless